Archives Sept. 14, 2005

Wednesday, 14th September 2005

Chip

Work.
I may be running a city store for 2 weeks. Hrm. It seems, according to the area manager and the store manager from that store, that I have a big "challenge". If there's not enough staff there, they can go jump off something. If the store is shit or there's stuff I have to fix, they can go jump off something. I am relief managing, why should I have to fix the store that I am in? Grrrrrr. Deep sense of forboding. I really don't need to get screwed with, there is a lot of stuff that I need to fix in my own store. Thumbs Down!Thumbs Down!Thumbs Down!

10:36 PM:
Hrm, heated 'discussion' with my area manager re: Pay. Foreboding was right. It seems there are also a few other managers that have joined the bandwagon too. Others also being roughted sideways. Big can of worms. They tell us to communicate with our surrounding stores! Well. I did. I have MUD on my mind.

>look
You are in an office at the back of a retail outlet.
There is a desk up against one wall. Above the desk is a window opening onto the shop floor. Just below the window there are two telephones mounted on the wall labelled ‘Line 1’ and ‘Line 2’. On the desk is a myriad of paperwork and different coloured stationary. There is a keyboard, a monitor, a mouse, a stapler, a tape dispenser, an orange A4 envelope addressed to you and a selection of stock items that shouldn't be there. In front of the desk is an office gas lift swivel chair. You see various scattered notes on the wall behind the desk reminding you and others to complete various tasks. Under the desk is a safe, the computer's CPU a filing cabinet and a vacuum cleaner. On the floor there is a can and some screwed up paper.

> get envelope from desk
You pick up an orange A4 envelope [closed].

> use envelope
Nothing happens. Perhaps if you opened the envelope.

> open envelope
You open the envelope [open]

> look envelope
The envelope [open] contains a letter of offer.

> get letter from envelope
You slide the letter out from the envelope. It is a letter of offer addressed to you.

> use letter
Nothing happens. Perhaps if you read the letter.

> read letter
Letter of offer. You. Position. Salary: $[not enough]
You are pissed off.

> get can opener from desk
You pick up a can opener.

> look can opener
This is a shiny new Stabco can opener. It is an old style manual can opener. The brand Stabco is embossed along the small green plastic handle.

> get all from floor
You pick up a ball of paper.
You pick up a can.

> dest ball of paper
You destroy a ball of paper using your Zapper[1].

> look can
Writhetech Can 'o Worms. Once this shit starts, it’s not going to be contained easily, guaranteed. On the back of the can there is a small blurb: Writhetech pride themselves on creating situations that can’t be easily resolved. Our research and development team are always adding new features to our series of Can ‘o’ Worms. Using parallel processing and a number of random number generators this product continually adds elements to the situation as time progresses guaranteeing you long lasting chaos and a shit storm you can be proud of! Shake before use.

> use can
Nothing happens. Perhaps if you opened the can or shook the can something might happen.

> open can
You can not open the can without some sort of tool.

> shake can
The can starts to violently shake in your hand and works it’s way out of your grip. The can drops to the floor still shaking violently. After about 10 seconds pass, the shaking settles down to a dull rumble.

> get can
You pick up a can [rumbling].

> use can opener with can
At arms length you begin to open your Writhetech Can ‘o’ Worms. I guess you want to start some major shit! The can hisses as you break the seal. You start working your way around the edge of the can using a levering action. You progress to three quarters the way around and the lid leaps off explosively. Using all your strength you maintain your grip on the can as it unleashes nothing less than an earthquaketyphoonocane! Stock is falling off shelves, paper is blowing around your office wildly. Phones, faxes printers are all operating at random. Your computer monitor explodes. Silence. You peer over the steaming mouth of the can read on the bottom inside face: Consider your shit started.